On Sunday, Tom Brady took heat like he was standing behind a junior varsity offensive line going up against the 1985 Chicago Bears. Netflix’s “Roast of Tom Brady” was a hit and got us thinking about other famous athletes who would make for great roast fodder.
The Brady roast brought out stars from across industries. Actor and comedian Kevin Hart hosted the event. Former New England Patriots coach Bill Belichick was there along with former receiver Julian Edelman. Even Kim Kardashian took the stage while seasoned roast comedians like Nikki Glaser and Jeff Ross were there to provide some real flame-throwing from the podium.
When looking for a list of the next possible roastees, we tried to find people who are truly legends within their sport. Of course, it also helps the entertainment value if that person hasn’t shied away from a little controversy throughout the years.
The success of the Brady event means there will probably be more like it in the future, so here is a list of sports personalities ranging from NBA GOATs to NFL owners who would make the best targets.
Michael Jordan
If Tom Brady can get roasted, then no one is off limits, no matter how many rings they have. That being the case, let’s put Michael Jordan himself in the hot seat. Bring out some of Jordan’s biggest rivals from his time on the hardwood. Isiah Thomas, Patrick Ewing and Larry Bird could all be part of the dais. The roast could also feature Jordan’s former Chicago Bulls teammates like Scottie Pippen, who might still have something to settle with MJ. Don’t forget Steve Kerr, who probably has some pent-up resentment from taking a punch to the face.
The “Roast of Michael Jordan” could also weave in current players with LeBron James as part of the event. The debate about the NBA’s GOAT could be a running thread, and we might be able to turn this thing into a two-night event with James becoming the target after Jordan. Then maybe we could finally settle the Jordan-LeBron debate once and for all.
Charles Barkley
Keeping it in the NBA, there are few basketball personalities more opinionated than Barkley. Tune into “NBA on TNT” and you will see Barkley roasting players and his co-hosts alike. The man just sent the New Orleans Pelicans to Galveston, Texas instead of Cancun for their end-of-season vacation. Obviously, Shaquille O’Neal and Kenny Smith would have to be part of the event, and I’m sure Ernie Johnson has some quips in his back pocket after years of sitting next to the Round Mound of Rebound. It would probably also be a good idea to let the NBA players Barkley has called out on TV to fire back at him, but the stage is only so big, and the roast probably needs to have a time limit.
Tiger Woods
The greatest golfer in history, Tiger Woods has done it all while being under the microscope for the wrong reasons. The best roast target is a controversial legend, and Woods absolutely fits that bill. The 15-time major winner is an American sports icon, but he has also had a very public fall from grace. A roast would allow Woods to lay it all out there with comedians and fellow athletes taking turns torching him about some of his escapades away from the course. When it comes to guests, the dais would be as star-studded as any on the list. Phil Mickelson and John Daly would keep the evening interesting, and golf enthusiast Michael Jordan could probably also be talked into an appearance.
Jerry Jones
When you think about the most roast-able personalities in football, Jerry Jones has to be at or near the top of the list. The owner of the most polarizing franchise in the NFL, Jones has a tendency to express his opinions rather freely. That can create friction with players and coaches alike. Just ask Jimmy Johnson, who was only just inducted into the Cowboys’ Ring of Honor last December, which was 30 years since he coached the team to back-to-back Super Bowls. Jones isn’t a stranger to off-field controversy either, so there would be plenty of joke fodder there as well. Obviously, Johnson would have to be part of the cast, and other ex-Cowboys like Michael Irvin, Emmitt Smith, Troy Aikman, Tony Romo and Deion Sanders could get involved too.
Alex Rodriguez
A-Rod is no stranger to getting hate. He experienced that throughout his entire 22-season MLB career. That vitriol really kicked up a notch in 2004, when Rodriguez signed with the New York Yankees and became part of the Evil Empire. Being a highly-paid star on the Yankees is enough to draw some heat on its own, but Rodriguez had his share of controversies that went beyond the diamond too. Most notably, Rodriguez was entangled in the Biogenesis PED scandal and missed the entire 2014 season because of a suspension and appeal process. The well of potential roasters is pretty deep and can include anyone from Derek Jeter to Ryan Dempster, who already took a couple of shots at Rodriguez in 2013. Hold the roast in Fenway Park, and you might be able to sell out an entire weekend’s worth of shows.
Brad Marchand
Every NHL game is filled with players roasting each other between the whistles. One of the more prolific trolls is Marchand, who is an All-Star pest in addition to being an actual All-Star. Marchand has been known to stir the pot on the ice, sometimes crossing the line to the point of making frequent visits to the penalty box. That said, his wise-cracking extends well beyond the 200×85 ice surface. Marchand has fired plenty of shots on social media, even taking on the entire Carolina Hurricanes organization once. There are players from 31 other teams who would love their chance to fire barbs at Marchand, and there is no question he would relish the opportunity to do the same to them.
Conor McGregor
It’s probably fair to assume this is the most volatile roastee on the list, which probably only lends itself to more dramatic TV. McGregor is used to giving and receiving hits in the octagon, but now he gets the chance to do some verbal sparring on stage. Of course, McGregor has plenty of experience in cutting a promo on opponents. Just go to YouTube if you want to spend a few hours viewing his best work in that department. The only concern with this roast would be that the Proper No. Twelve and testosterone gets flowing and things get a little physical on stage. Maybe the organizers just shouldn’t invite Khabib Nurmagomedov to be a roaster.
Brett Favre
If you’re looking for another legendary quarterback to roast, Brett Favre probably fits the bill. Not only is Favre one of the greatest gunslingers in NFL history, but there is a laundry list of material for the guests of honor to work into their material. Favre’s dramatic split with the Green Bay Packers, as well as his brief stints with the New York Jets and Minnesota Vikings, would be a good place to start. From there, attention would turn to some of Favre’s less flattering off-field antics, and something tells me volleyball might be mentioned once or twice. Make sure to get Aaron Rodgers on that stage too.
Kim Mulkey
The LSU head coach is known for her intensity on the court, flamboyant outfits and lack of filter in the media. That’s a good recipe for a roast, and Mulkey has gotten a lot of attention from fans and haters alike over the last few years as women’s basketball continues to spike in popularity. Some of Mulkey’s former players, including Angel Reese, could be involved, but the list wouldn’t end there. Get some rival coaches from other programs around the country, like UConn’s Geno Auriemma, and see how this evolves into a glorified recruiting pitch.
